Merry Christmas

First Day persons (those who have never contemplated suicide) may be struck by the many different and conflicting thoughts and feelings in the same Bible. The diversity of experiences found within the Scripture should save us from a rush to judgment regarding the topic of suicide. At the very least it should evoke compassion and mercy rather than condemnation.
Both First Day and Second Day persons seek a spiritual path which will bring healing into the life of persons dwelling in the Night of suicidal thinking, and hopefully prevent their deaths. Where is the “balm of Gilead?” Christian theology typically locates the death of Jesus as the locus of salvation. For those trying to make their way out of the Night and into a Second Day, the death of Jesus may not be the aspect of his life that is the most compelling. It is well known in the suicide prevention community that an indiscriminant celebration of a person’s life after their suicide invites a contagion of similar behavior among those who are already thinking about killing themselves. Focusing on the death of Jesus as a path to a better life beyond death has not proven protective for many people in the Night of suicidal thinking.
Many Second Day people have found it helpful to focus on a different point of the Gospel narrative, namely, the entry of Jesus into the world. “The people that walked in the Darkness have seen a great light,” is the promise of the prophet Isaiah, fulfilled in the Gospel of Luke. What is this Light, romanced in story and symbolized by Epiphany’s star? It is the revelation of a fundamental life-altering truth: The fullness of God’s love cannot be expressed by words alone. To fully experience “God-with-us” requires a human, flesh and blood person. This ideal was brought to life in Jesus of Nazareth who went about delivering people from every form of darkness. His ministry of “God-with-us” continues to be expressed by human beings who are now referred to as “his Body”. When you care enough to send the very best, you don’t send a card! You send a person!
It is clear from the research that being a part of a spiritual community can be a protective factor for many who are thinking about killing themselves. It is equally clear that it is not the particular belief system that is protective. It is the presence of the community itself. Our creedal statements and doctrines have little power to save a person in the Night from falling into eternity. But our presence as a sacramental expression of the love of God can be decisive! When we understand that we are God’s hands, every encounter is potentially life-saving. When this attitude is carried in the soul of a community, hospitality is elevated from the status of “friendliness” to the “touch of life”. We offer God’s love as a holy “wonder”: “I wonder if my presence is saving your life today?” You never know.
I would argue that Christmas should be claimed by people of the Second Day. (The belief that December has the highest suicide rate is simply another in a long list of myths. That dubious distinction belongs to April.) What a wonderful time to give to one another the present of your presence by renewing this pledge: “As far as it is in our power, you will never be alone and you will never lose hope. Stay with us. We would not be the same without you.” This simple renewal would rescue the holiday season from the trite commercialism that everyone knows is hollow. It would potentially save thousands of lives and millions of injuries. Can you think of a better Christmas?

On the outside, he seemed fine. One associate described him as amiable and fun-loving. He described himself as appearing to enjoy life rapturously. But he confided in a friend that he was the victim of a terrible sadness. When he was 27 years old he began having thoughts of killing himself that were so strong when he was alone that he dared not carry a pocket knife. Was he simply selfish? Was he a chronic failure, an irreversible loser? He was, in fact, Abraham Lincoln.

I call Abraham Lincoln a Second Day person. He survived his night of suicidal thinking and emerged to transform a nation, indeed, a world. Here is the question: “Would someone like Abraham Lincoln be welcomed to share his story in your church, service organization, or school?” Unfortunately, the stigma and shame of suicidal thinking has made this nearly impossible. As a result, all the stories of hope for those considering suicide are missing.

There are millions of Second Day persons. At least 25% of the persons you know have experienced a time in their lives when they seriously considered suicide. But their voices have been silenced by stigma and shame. Are you willing to help by encouraging others to tell their story? Perhaps it is more personal than that. Can you find the courage to share your story as a way of giving others hope? This blog is for the sharing of those stories and offering the light of hope to others.

Let me know your thoughts. And please share this blog with others you know.

Second Day Persons

Studies show that about 6% of persons in the United States are considering suicide. That's about 18 million persons. Fortunately, most of these persons will find a way to emerge from their Night of suicidal thinking and will live productive lives. It is less fortunate that most of these persons will never speak of their experience. This is a tragic loss since the persons most able to identify with those considering suicide are silenced and effectively removed as resources in the work of suicide prevention. Little will change in the rates of suicide in the United States until Second Day persons can step forward and make their insights available to those living in desparation.

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